As parents, it is natural for us to want to protect our children and give them opportunities and experiences. We give them lessons for riding, skiing, sailing, tennis, dance, golf, send them to the best schools, and provide them with the best equipment we can to protect them whenever we can. This is all done between busy schedules and the ruthless time demands that often come hand in hand with wealth.
As parents, we must manage our businesses, business holdings, social and civic responsibilities, travel schedules, staffs, etc. Consequently, the children of wealth may not always get the lessons they need to deal with instantly being thrown into this complex world.
While most children have lots of time to build their identities, the children of wealth already have an identity as “a well-known person’s child.” It may not be something they chose or wanted. They are often left to deal with what that role is or should be on their own. Sometimes they do not do so gracefully or in a way that is beneficial to them in the long run. They need help growing into these demanding identities while building self confidence in their own right.
Occasionally, when money is more available than time, it is easier to buy children what they want. Entitlement may become the norm. When help in their many of their homes have already completed all the household chores, children of wealth often may have little opportunity to learn the skills or fully comprehend the relationship of hard work to the achievement of goals. It is these situations, which sometimes leads to wealth weakening our children, instead of catalyzing their growth.
Unlike children of more modest means, children of wealth often do not have things that they must dream of for long periods of time. They do not learn to find ingenious ways to achieve their goals or learn how to save to make things happen.
Sometimes they do not have the opportunity to learn how to be happy independent of spending or to make friendships that are independent of having any money at all. They sometimes lose opportunities to prove themselves and/or to be proud of themselves, because their accomplishments can seem to pale in light of those of their parents or their for-bearers.
Children of wealth need situations, where they can accomplish things that they are truly proud of. It is through these activities that they gain self-confidence and pride. They need opportunities to form friendships and relationships independent of their family’s fortunes, doing activities that do not require wealth. Finding situations to build true confidence, is often catalyzed by finding situations for the children of wealth to add value and attain skills that add to their identity, independent of who their parents are.
We have worked with families to help their children learn about wealth management, trusts, financial markets, economics, etc. We also help clients construct situations where their children can learn how to handle the social and financial challenges that wealth presents, so that they can be prepared to address them well.
Call us to discuss your particular situation. 978-430-0150